Rant Post Alert!
Valentine’s Day just went by a few days ago and as expected, my social media feeds were flooded with mushy messages & photos of people celebrating the day with their loved ones. While I do wish my better half, of late we don’t really do anything else EXTRA to ‘celebrate’ the day. I may create something that I know he will like to use or maybe go out to a quiet dinner if we are up for it – but that is about it. However, I am not condemning any of the others who do celebrate it. Each couple should celebrate it as it suits them.
My jaded view of the day is towards those celebrations which are just for an Insta post or to compete with others or those who do it because everyone else is doing it. They go about obsessing over the V-day gifts, that the true essence of the day is completely lost on them. Let me give you a couple of real-life stories to support my jaded view.
Heer & Ranjha are a couple ‘very much in love’ in the eyes of all their friends and family. In reality, they are very good actors who put up this ‘hunky-dory’ relationship. They have no trust in each other and their relationship is filled with emotional abuse. Each of them is also having an affair. However, come Valentine’s Day they throw couple parties and proclaim their love with flowery messages to each other on social media.
Image Courtesy : Susan Lu4esm On Pixabay
Beth & Darcy are a couple who love to flaunt. Every year they buy each other expensive phones, diamonds or even a car. While these buys may sometimes be the need-of-the-hour, they make sure to time the big buys around V-day. Granted that this may serve a dual purpose and some may feel it is a smart move. However, since they are flaunters they post these gifts to their friends and family and itemize how they have been gifting expensive things because they love each other. They also never fail to ask others, what they gave or received as gifts! The key relationship here is not between two individuals but between the degree of love and expense of the gift.
Jane & Joe have been married for many years now. Jane thinks V-day celebrations are crucial to show each other and others that their love is young and still going strong. Because she is old school and thinks V-day is about the lady receiving gifts, this means she also expects Joe to ‘surprise’ her with some grand gesture to prove his love. Poor Joe is at his wit’s (and pocket’s) end EVERY YEAR because he fears not living up to Jane’s expectations.
In all these stories there is one common factor – the drama of love to create a false narrative, to tell others of their fabulousness as a couple, and to show others they are not loved if they don’t have these celebrations in their lives.
While these may not define many relationships, I see an alarming increase in this trend as each year goes by. Maybe it is the influence of Social Media, but there is now a need to ‘show-off’ love too.
If you don’t get roses on V-day, does it mean your husband/boyfriend doesn’t love you?
If you get a card or a shirt or a book instead of designer wear or diamonds, does it mean your partner doesn’t love you?
If you don’t post a picture of your celebrations and gift, does it mean the world thinks you have a problematic relationship?
If your post doesn’t get the validation of likes, comments, and shares, does it mean your relationship is doomed?
While Valentine’s Day is not an Indian concept, shouldn’t it be about the relationship between 2 people instead of just focusing on other people or gifts or celebrations?
What is so wrong with a low-key or no special celebration, anyway?
PS : Rant Post Spoiler Alert – Women’s Day Special coming soon 🙂